Two wise guys, more or less, sit, their backs against the wall, at 'Luigi's Little Sicily,' the Best Risotto in Boston."So, Sal?" says Nico. "You called me down here. Whatcha got. It's a busy night. We gotta hit that dry cleaners, Shanahan's. Can't let that flake off the hook. $200 bucks. What? Guy has a caniption. He should be ashamed. Nobody'd pay us they hear we let the guy skate. Then where'd we be? Screwed, you ask me."
"Nico, come on," says Sal. "You worry too much. I'm thinking, we gotta move up in this organization, you know."
"You're telling me."
"Doing collections all me life. Not my dream job."
"Okay? Life of broken dreams. So?"
"Here's what we gotta do. We gotta make The Boss know who the hell we are. We gotta do something for him. That's what we gotta do."
"Yes...yes...yes...?" Eyes on Sal, Nico gulps from a champagne glass.
"So, I'm writing him a letter," says Sal. "The Boss reads it, he'll call us in, and say we're Gumbas, you know, and no more collecting from Bozos who don't want to pay. We got more ambition than that, right."
Nico looks over the glass, and frowns. "I'm still listening."
"Here's what I got so far." Sal unfolds a piece of paper. "Dear Mr. Carmine, 'The Boss,' Scuzziano...Maybe just Mr. Scuzziano...No, The Boss." He looks up. "Maybe we shouldn't write a letter. Nothing in writing's probably be best. We'll just discuss this with him over plates of Chicken Cacciatore."
"No," says Nico. "Something better. Lobster Ravioli. It's The Boss."
"Or maybe Linguini with Mushrooms and Clams, I like that better, or maybe..."
Nico gulps a spoonful of Macaroni and Mozzarella.
"So," says Sal. "Here's what I've done. The Boss will love this."
"Sal?"
"Okay, okay. The Boss likes baseball. But he loves the Red Sox more, right? And he thinks Mike Scioscia, manager of the Angels, is the best manager in Baseball. So I'm thinking, we get Scioscia to manage the Red Sox. What are the Red Sox, 20 games back right now?"
"Mike Scioscia? Take over the Red Sox? Yeah, The Boss would like that, but...Scioscia'd be nuts to leave the Angels. Never happen, million years."
"Why not. Grease the right peo..."
"Have you seen the Angel's line up?" says Nico. "Albert Pujols, and that pitcher C.J. Wilson, come on. Greinke. What about Trout? Guy's going for MVP."
Sal chews, spaghetti spun on his fork, half a dry meat ball. "But The Boss says Scioscia's the best manager in Baseball, real studious and all. He's got a notebook in front of him he keeps looking at, playing the percentages. So I talked to Tony Goofalio..."
"You talked to The Belly...Tony Goofalio?"
"Yeah," says Sal. "Close personal friend of mine. Says he knows a guy, who knows a guy, says he can get Scioscia voted into the Baseball Hall of Fame. He probably won't make it as a player, or as a manager, so this is his only chance."
"What? Hall of Fame? No way."
"Nico, there's nothing we can't do. It's for The Boss. Besides, it's already in the works. I put out the story to TMZ, and FanNation. 'Red Sox Eye Scioscia for New Manager.'
"Yeah I heard, last week, Sports Center." Nico looks down and stirs his macaroni and soupy cheese with his spoon.
"Now The Angel owner Arte Moreno has to come out and say there's no way he'll fire Scioscia."
"Yeah, I heard that too."
"And when they say it'll never happen, then you know it will probably happen. It's now in the works. See how I did that?"
"But," says Nico. "Scioscia has to go for it?"
"He will. Scioscia wants to close out his career near his home, not way out there in California. He graduated from Springfield High, suburbs of Philly. The Hall of Fame, he can't say no."
Nico looks at Sal, then shovels in a large spoonful, macaroni and cheese, Little Sicily style, and sips Coconut Brandy, straight, the good stuff. "I don' know."
Sal slaps the table. "The Boss said that Scioscia was better than Yogi Berra, or even Campanella...or Thurman Munson. Better. So when he hears about this, we're in."
"But, the Hall of Fame?"
Sal smiles and sops up spaghetti sauce with a toasted piece of Italian French Bread. His mouth full, "How can this not work? Scioscia has nothing left to prove? He'll jump at a chance like this."
Nico, ready to leave, grabs his coat. "You sure about this?" He tosses $40 on the table.
Sal turns, surprised. " He'll be living in Wellesley, and commuting by helicopter. With The Red Sox back in the World Series, The Boss'll be tickled to death. Trust me, Nico, we got this in the bag."
............................
HELP COMES FROM:
http://msn.foxsports.com/mlb/story/los-angeles-angels-manager-mike-scioscia,
cbssports.com/mlb/story/20344296/owner-says-scioscia-will-be-back-next-year,
http://hardballtalk.nbcsports.com/2012/09/07/the-red-sox-are-eyeing-mike-scioscia/
readabilityformulas.com, Google/Images, Scioscia/Wikipedia,
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